How long more?

... for do i have to continue this dead life? I feel dead at school. No thats wrong... i may be really dead at school. The only thing i sought for when at school. The only thing i long for... is home. Everything at school feels pointless. Everybody seems to be smiling and laughing. How much of these are forced? How much are faked? How much are to conceal their unhappiness? 

For what, do we continue if all we have is pain...

Will be pointlessness continue until i complete my education...

No. 

It will continue.

As long as i don't have money... these pointlessness cannot stop. Yet this pointlessness must continue. Because society demands it. Because society says that it brings us money. IF WE DO THIS POINTLESS CRAP, WE WILL BE RICH LIKE FUCK! Get a high paying job! Get high income!

BE RICH LIKE FUCK THEN USE YOUR MONEY TO GET YOURSELF A LIFE.

...What pointlessness... We do pointless things to continue doing pointless things. 

For what then, have i started to do these pointless things? Why have i not stopped? 

Do i like it?

What a foolish question... I HATE IT

I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT!!!!!!

Thats right... I am already dead.

The only place and time i feel at ease... Is when i watch the illusory world of stories. Ahh... How beautiful... the dreams... the emotions... the characters not present in this world... 

When will i join them? 

...

Never... until i obtain unlimited power... money... or when someone with similar thoughts gain them.

The people in this world... the modern world... have little dreams. They say they want to do those things... but those are mere wishes. Mere wants. Admiration. 

Definitely not a dream.

They find excuses to not pursue them. And yet even when it is obtained, their desire is not satisfied. 

When given unlimited power, they give up their dream. 

Right. What people wish for is money! And to obtain it, somebody else will have to lose it!

There is no turning back already. The world has wished for this... There is only 3 paths left for me to go. 

Continue this pointlessness and die pointlessly.

Continue this pointlessness, become one of the rich like fuck, end my own pointlessness. Then restart my own pointlessness. Then die pointless.

Obtain unlimited power. Change the world. End this pointlessness.

Note: This is not a suicide note, despite all the hints that seems like it down there... I would rather end the world then kill myself. Suiciding because of the foolishness of other people is stupid. 

I Hate School

It is not that simple as the hate a delinquent harbors against his/her school. Of course, i hold the same hate towards school. School is pointless! Waste of time! Waste of childhood! Energy! Money! Resources! People!

Every time i see charities building schools, teaching the children of those poor nations. I think. What the fuck? Just give them decent jobs. Teach them the skills required for the jobs and just skip school. Keep the money for making the school, give them food or something.

But, what does it mean to hate school? Why does school exist in the 1st place? The answer is simple. To allocate jobs to people with relevant skills according to their results. People have no dreams! No aspirations! They don't know what they want to do, but are forced to do so, and choose anyway! Why do we need to take so many subjects and not just one? Why do we study subjects half-assed then discard them when we get jobs?

Looking at the non-academic side, its a bunch of bull-shit as well. Moral education? Just pushing their own beliefs on how we should live on us. Is this not a form of brainwashing?(not that it succeeded) Comments on your character from your teachers? Merely a bunch of words. Words can be beautified with sufficient skills of language. Easily. For example, what is an over-ly obsessed fan of a certain music group called? A pervert or retard. In other words, he is ''passionate about music'' and ''makes the time and effort to fervently pursue music''. What is CCA achievement? Leadership skills? You think your achievements on such a small scale actually matter?

Enough about schools. Then, why allocate jobs to people? Because the world has to progress with activity and people need to live. Why can't we just give jobs to people then? Why do we need to live? How are we going to live? Money.

Money.

Money!! Yes- the root of all problems lies here. And why did money exists? 1st, people shared. As they grew uglier, people want to keep something for themselves. It was no longer ''you need it, i give you la!''. Its ''you need it, you BETTER give me something i need.'' Then butter trade. Then stones as exchange. Then money.

Which means, my hatred for school is not to just the institution itself. It is to hate money - to hate mankind itself! Humans are ugly! Selfish! They weren't able to trust each other, giving birth to unnecessary conflicts and stuff.

Why waste resources on military forces? Why, when people are teaching and telling us that it is right to donate to the poor, money is NEVER eliminated? Because, the purpose of money reveals the truth! People inherently wants to be better, stronger than others. When donating, you never donate half your assets. You donate a fraction. Then, you go back home and waste more than you just donated. Why, i don't hear the most powerful people devoting at least half their assets but only a mere fraction to aid others? Why, do i get the feeling that the most generous people are poor? Because money, is less of a part of their live.

Why do people steal? Rob? Kill? Make meaningless conflicts in the name of religion! Territory?!

If only, i had unlimited power or money...

...

Foolish human beans...

Another Strange Dream

In my dream, i was reading a novel in my bed. That is nothing special, but why does it feel like i was really reading the novel? I can remember that every word of the novel was read out. The sad thing is, like all dreams i forget more than half of them the moment i woke up. So i don't really remember the words! But it feels like a professional writing the words. At least in the dream. How can i think of professional words when i'm not professional? Is it because its only a feeling(no words are actually read out...)? Is it because i am pro?

Because i woke up, i forgot most of the story already. The only thing i remember about the story is that :
1. It is interesting. Enough for me not to want to wake up...
2. There are 10 creatures or 6 (i remember these 2 numbers appearing, with 6 appearing at the last page of the chapter). They are 10/6 different characters. Of which, 1 is a zombie. 1 is a vampire. The rest.... i don't remember. Waking up sucks. If only i can write out the novel as i dream.
3. The creatures are somehow linked together(duh, its a story). Could be a house, or whatever.
4. The creatures shouldn't exist in this world (anymore? i can't remember if its 'anymore' or 'in the 1st place').
5.  The creatures are probably the only ones in the world?
6. They, somehow have 6 descendants who are about to be in the REAL story.
7. I was reading the prologue of the story.
8. Somehow, the prologue of the story seems to be a mix of a prologue AND the author's words, commenting on why the creatures were created by the author and etc stuff on why the author didn't do other stuff.
9. I don't remember the cover of the book nor the title...
10. I remember something about foolish Italian(actually, i don't really remember the country. It could be even somewhere that doesn't exist) women drinking wine to find that the wine contains something. (its a 2 word phrase that isn't in English. The me in my dream who was reading it thinks its a bomb, but later thought that it could be poison or drugs.)

Exactly when i finish reading the 1st chapter/prologue/author's words, close the book, and ready to sleep. I woke up. The timing was too perfect. It is as if someone planned this dream.

Then i woke up IRL, thinking what a dream! I must write that novel! But my memory doesn't allow me to do that because more than half of the dream is gone.

Who planned that dream? Is it my inner conscious wanting me to write a novel? Is it the ghost of a novelist possessing me to give a dream to write his novel? Is it the future me doing something to make my dream appear like this? Is it an inspiration some godly power gave me to ask me to write the novel?! All points to asking me to write it!!

I need to sleep! To read the continuation! To make this dream true! I'll post chapter 1/2 on this blog when i read it in my dream again!

...................

Like that could happen...

Rearranging my manga collection

After starting this blog for so long... i've probably never said anything about myself except that i like ice lemon tea. By the way, the ice lemon tea i like must be Pokka brand. Other brand de ice lemon tea i don't like! Home made de depends... Hmmm...

NO!!

Yes!!

Anyway, I've arranged my manga, because theres no space in my room, and i had to move my cupboard upstairs to the attic. And i bought more manga(and planning to buy more)... So, pictures and a little description will do the job.

Behold my collection...

The cupboard containing my manga in my room. Only 2 levels are used... I'll zoom in now.

There you go, 57 volumes of One piece and 3 Data files(Red, Blue, Yellow).

But wait! If you notice carefully, looking through Data file Blue and Yellow, theres a blue book behind!

Because theres more!

Behind One Piece:

32 volumes of Shaman King(fin) below,

6 Volumes of To-Love-ru!(don't plan to continue buying this...)

2 volumes of Monster Soul(fin)

And one extra volume of Crayon Shin-chan.

Above that is 21 volumes of Full Metal Alchemist(FMA),

4 volumes of Haruhi Suzumiya Light Novels. 

On to the other level.

If you notice now, theres 3 front-back levels. 

Front most level:

Some One Piece poster from some magazine.

17th volume of FMA, because i'm stupid and bought an extra one.

Damn you if you agree i'm stupid.

Then, volume 2-10 of Rosario Vampire missing volume 4 =(. 

Volume 1 to 5 of... some Pokemon manga. This Pokemon manga adaptation is full of fart 

jokes, so i'm putting it in my room.

4 more volumes of the RS version of that Pokemon manga =).

Both are incomplete... and i lost my 6th volume of the non-RS version... T_T

Volume 1 to 13 of Death Note. 

That ''something'' in between volume 12 and 13 is some Death Note post cards.

Behind Rosa-Poke-DN:

29 volumes of Mahou Sensei Negima! unopened... cause i just bought them.

1-10(fin) of MX0.

Behind the Magic-related manga:

1-40 of Dragon Ball on the bottom,

41 and 42 of DB on the right.

From the left now,

1-8(fin) Midori Days

1(fin) Aoi Destruction

1-9 Of Ai Kora

10-12 Ai Kora is with my friend...

1-3(fin) of some Pokemon G&S adaptation, which isn't too bad IMO.

Volume 19&20 of Naruto(Tong Li), bought from the same friend, because

he doesn't want Tong Li in his Chuang Yi.

I'm still regretting buying those 2 volumes... OTL

Volume 1-16 of Hayate! the Combat Butler.

Lets go to the attic now...

The top level contains nothing much. I'll zoom in the rest.

Starting from bottom. 

1-26 Tsubasa Chronicles. 

Theres nothing behind.

2nd from bottom level:

Volume 3 of Shaman King. 

Because i'm stupid and did the same mistake of buying the same volume again.

Damn you again if you agreed.

Some volumes of Detective Conan. Was planning to complete, but the story dragged on too long.

Some volumes of Doraemon.

1-3 of Medabots. I do regret buying this.

More Doraemon on the top. 

Volume 1-6(fin) of Kindaichi Case Files Special.

Nothing behind.

The last cubicle...

On the bottom is 1-27 of some Pokemon adaptation.

Called Pokemon adventures. (Pocket Monsters Special in Japan)

IMHO the best Pokemon Adaptation there ever is.

Hundred thousand times better than Ash and Pikachu.

2 Gazillion times better than Team Rocket who can't do anything.

If you need more convincing, 

Satoshi Tajiri once stated that the Pocket Monsters Special series is closest to what he imagined the Pokémon world to be: "This is the comic that most resembles the world I was trying to convey."^[1] (僕が伝えたかった世界に最も近い漫画です。 Boku ga tsutaetakatta sekai ni mottomo chikai manga desu.^?)

Back to my manga. Behind Pocket Monsters Special theres more...

Volume 2-9(fin) Digimon V-Tamers. 

I'm missing volume 1 =(.

Skipping 2 books, i have Rockman 1-8...

 Some Conan Specials...

And the rest are stuff i regret buying like shit.

Including that 2 skipped volumes.

1 Pokemon Jiraichi movie... what...

Some Digimon manga adaptation that failed badly.

Volume 1-7 Beyblade. (my top regret...)

1-4(fin) The electric tales of Pikachu. Darn this :(.

1-13 Let's & Go. My top regret as well... 

Bloody tamiya cars.

My Lessons learnt today:

1) My cupboard isn't suitable for putting manga. Seriously, front-back levels?! Top and bottom levels?! 

    I need to buy a room and cupboard just for fitting my manga collection.

    Something like this!

Or this!

NOT THIS BELOW!!!! 

How the hell am i supposed to get that volume in the middle oh what the hell lets take and the whole thing collapses mutton goes yay.

Thats not all though. I still need something more than just the wood. 

I need sliding glass panels to block out air so they won't grow yellow as fast.

2) Don't buy what i don't need. Beyblade OTL. Lets and Go OTL. Sonic Gear Earphones OTL (they suck, even though the package looks good).

3) For companies. Don't give what we don't need. Do you have any idea how much space is wasted on stuff we don't need? We don't need extra large boxes. We just need the handphone or whatever is supposed to be inside. The box should be small and compact, just leaving enough space to contain all the accesories. Better yet, if we can take the box and eat it too. If you just bothered to design the box a little, the company will save costs, consumers will save space, together we save the Earth as well (or at least delay its death for a few seconds). 

Those wrappers inside wrappers for chocolate and biscuits. Damn them as well. Just make them edible or something.

Bloody textbooks and notes. They are useless after our school years. Why the hell do we need quality paper for our textbooks anyway? Answer: To make our schoolbags heavier! duh! 


Onward and beyond:


I now have about 350 volumes of manga above. So now, i need to calculate how much more i will add to my collection.


Oh shi- I forgot to add my Yugioh and Pretty Face inside. Its behind me. 


Target: Build a manga library! 


Manga i plan to buy(that i don't have yet):


Yotsuba&! ongg   >10
Liar game ongg    >10      +>10 ~ 40?
Hikaru no go 1-23 fin  =23       +40? = 63?
Cromartie High school 1-17 fin?       + 63? = 80?
Azumanga daioh = 4 volumes         +80? = 84?
Onani master kurosawa, but its a doujin so i cant buy. 
Bakuman! 


Manga i plan to buy(that i have):


FMA Expected volume end: 26, 5 more volumes     +84?=89?


One piece Its halfway through, so i expect about 100 volumes? Missing about 50.   +89? = 139?


Haruhi light novels : >6     ~ 10? + 139? ~ 150?


Rosario vampire: missing 2, might as well complete. Not sure for season 2 tho. +> 2+ 6 ~ 12? 
12? + 139? ~ 151?


Tsubasa chronicles: its just 2 volumes.   151? + 2 = 153?


Mahou Sensei Negima! : I have no idea ^^. Lets say its another 20 volumes.  ~ 173?


+Pretty face + Yugioh = +6 + 38 + 5 = + 49  ~ 222?


Add together, Its 500+. Not enough to make a manga library. So...


Other Manga for considerations:


Naruto:
I don't like the presentation, even though the story is good. On watch for now.


Katekyo Hitman Reborn!:
I dunno, just don't really feel like buying even though i like it.


Lock on!


Nurarihyon no Mago


Hayate the Combat Butler


Fairy Tail


Monster Because i saw 18 volumes for $9 at a manga bazaar. If its still available...


Chobits Same reason as above, except its 8 volumes for $6 i think.


Mahoraba


Wa! but i dunno if there will be even any


More to come...


Its still not enough =(

Toilet Talk: The aftermath of the bombings

One day, at night, right after your CCA/lessons/whatever you suddenly had the urge for explosive toilet business. You rushed to the toilet and completed your task of creating a brown island in the middle of the Toilet Bowl sea. But now, you realized something important. There is no toilet paper! What should you do??

Conditions:
1. It is at night, a lot of people go home already. (you are not sure if that is ALL)
2. You spent a very long time completing your mission.
3. The only gadget you have is your hand phone and wallet.
4. You are alone in the toilet. (you are not sure if anybody will come in any moment)
5. Inside your wallet: 2 $50 notes, house keys, some coins, EZ link card, IC.
6. Your bag is not in the cubicle. 
7. Alright, your pants is brown. If that is a clue...

Options:
1. Call 999 for help! Your friends shall not abandon you stranded on the island!
2. Use your underwear to wipe! Then throw away that underwear!
3. Use... the... $50... 
4. Patiently wait for somebody to come in. And HOPE. HOPE!
5. Walk out of the cubicle bottomless, get some water from the basin. Wash.
Other (retarded) options:
6. Use your shirt to wipe.
7. Use your pants to wipe.
8. Use your house keys to wipe.
9. Use your coins to wipe.
10. Use your hand phone to wipe.
11. Use your wallet to wipe.
12. Use your IC/EZ link card to wipe.
13. Use your hands to wipe, then go wash your hands.
14. Wait for the brown stuff to harden, then go home.
15. Use the wall to wipe. Then wipe the wall later. 
16. Don't wipe. 
17. Others...

Sorry for coming up with such a topic(certainly not a good talk for around the coffee table)... was bored... But hey. At least i warned by stating Toilet Talk(and bombings). And not once have i said (the name of the brown). So what would you do?! 

Cleaning a bit...

Today, i was cleaning a bit of under my desk and behind my table. What i found was... my primary school drawing.

Thats a piece of drawing block (why do they call this hard piece of paper that is very hard to erase pencil from drawing block... i dunno). folded into halves.  And it writes.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

CONFIDENTIAL

     Except for ppl who wish to die.

PS. Warning on the other side

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

And this is the other side...

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Warning!!!!

Please do not open this this is highly luffable and toxic. Many have been polluted and even luffed to death.
Please open this if you wish to die.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You know what, lets open it.

What it writes:

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Villain A (boss)         The enemy(greatest) of Pman!

                                                         The ^v^ man

''Arrow pointing length of head'' 80cm

                                                                    Picture not drawn to scale

''Arrow pointing length of body'' 5cm

Stats

Str: I wonder how he holds his swords and even stand

Dex: None... look at below stats

Luk: Look at his face u know la!

Int: Big head small brains. Wait... none i mean

Age: 10+10+90

Powers: NOTHING... except stand there. Well at least he makes Pman laugh to death.

Height: 85cm

Weight: Half the Earth( the reason why Earth is heavy)

Head radius: 40cm

Body Height: 5cm

Status: A patient in a unknown mental hospital

By ^v^                              ^v^                            A*

                                                                                      24/5                  Good picture.

                                                                                                                      Head big.

                                                                                                                Description nice.

                                                                                                                     Very idiotic look.

                                                                                                                                          Good Job!!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What the... What is this i don't even-

Lesson learnt:

My phone camera sux, even though its supposed to be 5MP. 

Stupid story

Everybody knows that assembly is crap and should totally be cancelled... But yet we still do it. Why? We have absolutely no idea. Ok. Maybe because of the gahmen(government) and crap like that. but still, why the hell do we have to waste minutes waiting for assembly ( 10~20 for me) + assembly standing time? I could have gotten 40 minutes extra sleep... 

Well. But i do listen to what the assembly says mainly because there's nothing else to do. The most i can do is play around with those dirt in your eye and dart around chasing it... Wikipedia tells me those are floaters and apparently people are bored enough to research on stuff like this... 

So, today, the principal told a story of... What was the theme again? Oh, right. Forgiveness or something like that. 

John was bored and had nothing to do, so he decided to kick rocks on the old grandma's(his neighbor) window instead of doing more constructive things like playing with his friends... If he had friends. He worked as a newspaper delivery boy, by the way. No idea why he was not working and kicking rocks, but yeah. So the window broke... 

DAMN YOU WINDOW! DAMN YOU CLIPPY! DAMN YOU Blu..

Oh... Wait. Wrong Window.

So everyday John was guilty about it, and continued delivering newspapers to that Grandma. And so... he decided to save up money, and secretly slip in his money at night as an envelope into her letter box. So why did he wait until at night and not just pretending to slip into her letter box as part of the newspaper delivery? Probably cause his stupid. Thats why.

Not as dumb as this kid though... 

So the next day, as John delivered the newspaper to the grandma, the grandma stopped him and gave him some cookies. John took the cookies and happily munched on it while walking. Whether or not he ditched his job to eat cookies is not of importance now. 

NOW, HERE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF THE STORY.

He ate the cookies and bit something strange... so he took it out and see what it is. 

Then he fainted and died as he realized that it was actually a hidden poison needle meant to kill him. It was instant death...

Still, that was better than dying like this kid...

No just kidding.

He took it out and saw that it is an envelope with his money inside. The letter said something about... I can't remember, but you should know... its cliche stuff... 

Hold a damn minute...

I don't know what year it is... but i'm pretty sure cookies are pretty small. No way money and envelope can fit inside! Unless you're probably evil and decide to tear the money up to tiny pieces and put them inside each cookie, so that the boy can watch as his money got torn away and cry as he ate them and die. 

That grandma might have looked like this. If she was evil.

''EATh THISh! You Fugger!''

And why the hell does people like to do round about things like putting the envelope inside those cookies instead of just giving him back straight?! Why put it inside the cookie?! 

But remember, the cookie is more important then the money.

I would like to think that the grandma is truly evil. The story ended where it seemed like it was fine. The truth is that those cookies were expired, hence explaining why she decided to suddenly give cookies. Later the boy got sent to the hospital for excessive and explosive diarrhea and got his body scanned. Traces of money were found inside his body, all torn up. If those were coins, it is still some pretty deep shit. Then the boy died of diarrhea. 

Yeah, you can die of diarrhea.